How To Tell If Your Kid Is Sick Or Not

Ayub, Sulaiman and I have been diagnosed with hand-foot-and-mouth disease. Nothing serious (sore throat, fever, ulcers, rashes) but we’re highly contagious so aren’t allowed out of the house. 

 

Me: Ayub, it’s time for bed…

Ayub: Noooo… I don’t want to sleep.

Me: It’s ok. You can play again tomorrow… Because you’re not going to school.

Ayub: Oh yeah! Ayub is sick! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

 

And he runs to his bedroom, jumps on his bed and lies down.

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What is a nipple?

(While bathing Ayub, he points to his nipple)

Ayub: mama what’s this thing?

Me: a nipple.

Ayub: a nipple mama? I got a nipple? What’s it doing there?

Me: hmmm…

Ayub: mama? What does a nipple do? What’s it for? Why is it… Why is it… Why nipple mama?

*speechlesssssss*

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This Happens Every Monday To Friday…

Ayub speaks in loops on repeat. He will say the exact same phrase every morning before school from the time we leave home until we reach the school. And again when I pick him up from school in the afternoons. Every single weekday.

The reason he says this is because I quit my job for a while when we moved house so that I could help the kids get settled. Because I wasn’t working, for two months I would drop them off at school at 9am then pick them up at 12:30pm. When I went back to work, I extended their day care hours to 5pm.

Ayub cried every day for a week, thinking that I wasn’t going to come and get him. So I told him, “I promise I will never forget you and that I will always come and get you. Just sit on the sofa and wait for me. If something happens to Mama and I can’t come, Ayah will come and get you; if Ayah cannot come, Ah Ku will come and get you; if Ah Ku cannot, Atuk will come…” And I listed all the people who loved him and that made him feel better.

So this became his daily mantra:

 

Me: It’s time for school babies…

Ayub: Mama, Ayub don’t cry so much. Ayub just sit there, wait for Mama.

Me: Yes Ayub, I know. Ayub is a good boy.

Ayub: I don’t cry so much Mama. Ayub sit there. Wait for Mama come.

Me: Ok, clever boy.

Ayub: Mama?

Me: Yes?

Ayub: Ayub don’t cry so much. Ayub just sit there and wait for Mama come. Ayub don’t cry. Just wait Mama come.

Me: Ok.

Ayub: Mama? Ayub don’t cry so much. Yeah, Ayub just sit there. Ayub just wait for Mama and don’t cry… (to infinity and beyond)

 

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Misheard Lyrics: Kids Edition

Ayub learned about traffic safety at school. He was taught a song. I have no idea what the real lyrics are. But he sings this at every traffic light. Every. Single. One.

Twinkle twinkle traffic light,

Shining at the corner bright.

Red means stop,

Green means go.

Yellow means wait,

And oh no.

Red means stop.

(awkward pause)

Twinkle twinkle traffic light,

Shining at the corner bright.

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