Sulaiman: What’s “black” in Bahasa, Mama?
Me: Black is hitam.
Sulaiman: Oh yeah. Black is hitam. And white is…
Me: Pu–
Sulaiman: Kitten.
Me: Kitten?!
Sulaiman: Yeah, like a baby cat.
Me: White is putih.
Sulaiman: No. Black is hitam. Red is merah. Orange is oren. And white is kitten.
(In my bedroom)
Sulaiman: Mama, can I have a vitamin?
Me: Sure baby…
(I open the vitamin bottle and give him one)
Sulaiman: Yay! Mmm! I like vitamin. Mama, can I have another vitamin?
Me: Just one a day baby. You can’t take so many.
Sulaiman: I want a vitamin!
Me: No. You can have another vitamin tomorrow. Ok?
Sulaiman: Okaaaay…
(I’m in the kitchen and I overhear a conversation from Mr Ninja’s Man-Cave)
Sulaiman: Ayah, can you help me?
Mr Ninja: Yup…
Sulaiman: Can you open this for me?
Mr Ninja: Ok.
(Sulaiman walks by the kitchen)
Me: Sulaiman… Did you take another vitamin?
Sulaiman: No I not take. Ayah give me.
Sulaiman: Mama?
Me: Yes?
Sulaiman: My pepet is so small.
Me: Yeah. When you grow up and become a big boy, your pepet will grow bigger too.
Sulaiman: Mama?
Me: Yes?
Sulaiman: My pepet is oval.
We drive past a huge billboard about GST – the Goods & Services Tax that the government implemented on virtually every daily necessity thus slowly killing Malaysians 6% at a time.
Sulaiman: G… S… T… GST!
Me: Boo! I don’t like GST.
Sulaiman: I like GST!
Me: GST is the Goods & Services Tax. It means the politicians are taking Mama’s money.
Sulaiman: What?! They is taking Mama’s money?!
Me: Yup. Politicians taking my money. You want to be a politician Sulaiman?
Sulaiman: Yes.
Me: Are you going to implement GST too?
Sulaiman: No, I don’t like GST. I like HST!
Me: What’s HST?
Sulaiman: HST is Helps You Tea.
Sulaiman: Why Mama eat so big?
Me: Because I’m an adult.
Sulaiman: You’re a dog?
Me: No, an adult.
Sulaiman: No! I’m a dog and you’re a cat!
Me: Whaaa…
Sulaiman: Woof woof woof! Ayub you’re an ELEPHANT!